I have been getting the feeling for a while now that my time as a blogger has been coming to a close. In this blog post I’d like to discuss my reasons for closing this chapter of my life and lessons I have learned along the way. First, let me explain my reasoning for starting a blog. In the past, I was the type of person who would get involved in every single political or religious debate on social media. I would see something I disagreed with and automatically assumed I had to make my way into the argument. I often felt as though no one truly listened to my side and would argue with me just for the sake of arguing. I felt like I wasn’t heard or others would spin the argument around so fast that I couldn’t make my point. Thus, Glittering Faith was born. This blog was my outlet and way to let others hear my argument without being pummeled into the ground before I could finish a thought. The blog was created so my voice could be heard.
My perception has changed on quite a few things since I began blogging. One thing I’ve learned is: it isn’t what I have to say; it is more about what I do and what I hear. It is about what others have to say. Often times, we simply want to say what is on our minds and not listen to the other party. We just assume nothing they say makes sense if we disagree with one point they’ve already made. I’ve learned what makes the biggest difference is how people view me living my life and often, more importantly, what they don’t hear me saying. There are plenty of times I am stuck in difficult situations where the first thing I’d like to do is give someone a piece of my mind. Maybe the other person is being rude or difficult and all I can think of are harsh words and insulting responses. People notice when I don’t respond that way. It makes an impact whether I notice it or not. The Bible tells us even a fool seems intelligent when he keeps his mouth shut (Proverbs 17:28). Recently, I find myself choosing to close my mouth more and more. Sometimes I can even think of a kind and decent way to respond or handle the situation if I can convince myself to be calm enough to speak to whoever I feel is being rude to me. Responding with gentleness truly is something that has to be practiced over time.
Something I have learned about arguments and debates is no one will listen to me if I am angry or simply letting my emotions run the show. As a matter of fact, people usually won’t listen to anyone if they don’t know that person well or if they aren’t someone they look up to. Usually people are more willing to contemplate differing opinions if the other person is someone they are close to, for example a friend, relative, mentor, someone seen as more experienced in a certain area of expertise. People don’t listen to finger-pointing strangers. (People don’t even listen to finger-pointing relatives.) People don’t listen to condescension. People don’t listen to judgement or high-and-mighty bragging. People don’t listen to know-it-alls.
Does this mean we shouldn’t debate with anyone about anything? No, I don’t believe that. I believe it has to do with the approach more than anything. Jesus was a humble person. He crafted relationships with others as a way to guide them and they leaned on one another for support. When someone came to him and asked a question, he gave them something to think about. He didn’t simply tell them what to think; he made the people think for themselves.
I’ve personally never been the type of person who found it “easy” to open up to or meet new people. I’m reserved, shy, introverted, and private which makes it hard for me to talk to and relate to people in general. I’ve been this way for as long as I can remember even if I haven’t always seemed that way. This, in large part, is a reason why I decided to create this blog. I could never, let me repeat NEVER, see myself as someone who approached random people to talk about Jesus. Countless radio sermons almost had me convinced I was a very lousy Christian for not knocking on doors and witnessing to people. I have come to the conclusion that people are meant to “witness” in varying ways. Some may find it easy to strike up a conversation with a stranger in the grocery store. Some may not. God made each of us differently. I simply cannot conquer “small talk” or chit chat. I love deep conversations about thoughts and ideas, what someone thinks their purpose is, or the way they view the world. My mind goes blank when I attempt to talk about the weather or “how someone’s job is going.” I’ve tried it, but I’m not very good at it. I am designed in such a way that I crave deep relationships and that usually ends up being with just a few people. I can count on one hand how many people truly know me, not just the outer layer of me, but all of me. Those are the people I share my secrets with and give advice to when they ask for it (and vice versa). I can influence their lives and they (who I would say are all much more extroverted than I am) will in turn influence others. Whether you are someone speaking from a microphone or someone who has a very small circle, each and every one of us has our own way to influence and minister to those around us. There is no “one size fits all.” Not everyone is meant to be a Lysa Terkeurst or Beth Moore in order to make a difference. Some of us are just meant to be a Kyla J (or an Ashley, Kim, Jessica, or whoever you are reading this right now.) It isn’t necessary to have a “big voice” in order to make a big difference.
I have learned many lessons during my blogging journey and I do not think this is the end for me in terms of writing. I see other writing projects in my future, near or far I can’t say for certain. I’ve always loved to write as a means to express myself. I believe certain journeys are only meant to last a season and can end up being a completely different journey than what we originally thought. This journey began with me having many things to say and has ended with me choosing which things not to say. This journey leaves me with little desire to get things off my chest, to vent, to argue. It leaves me with a desire to LIVE and be the best living, breathing example I can possibly be.
With all my love and best wishes to you all,